A story of, for and about Hope. Our princess Honkey Plonk- Hope Olivia. One very special lil lady, who brings so much joy!
Monday, 25 October 2010
It's been.... Emotional!!! ( the half marathon 10.10.2010 )
It was... Emotional!
I can't believe it's all over. All the training, and nerves. I can honestly say; i thoroughly enjoyed the run.
The morning got off to a memorable start, when my water bottle leaked over me in the car, leaving me looking exactly Like I'd wet myself! I had to put this bit in, cause if I didn't Mary , who found the incident highly amusing and probably nearly her highlight of the day, would have no doubt commented at the bottom of this Blog 'you forgot to write about your accident' lol. In hindsight, the mission to find a dryer, at which I stood in my knickers, kept our minds occupied, and probably stopped us going insane with pre-race jitters.
I had my ipod loaded with my favourite tunes. At just past the halfway mark, Hope's song came on. 'you're amazing.. Just the way you are' I blinked back the tears as best as I could, as I reminded myself why I was doing this.
Seeing my lil family waiting at the end was great. Jordan and max joined me in running the last few hundred metres . Though I nearly tripped over as Max kept cutting me up , complaining at how slow I was running , and asking could I not go any faster. The fact that I'd just ran 13 miles, the last 1.5 of which were all uphill, completely insignificant to him! Lol
The fundraising has been great too. Auntie Mary raised bomb, and to my amazement the kids friend's dad- Steve, from the school, text out of the blue a few weeks before the race, and said he was running it anyway, and could he do it for Hope's wheels fund. In all, we've raised more than £1,000 (could be considerably more, but not counting my chickens till they've hatched). I've been moved by the generosity of friends. Some whom we've never met in person, but whom I'm online friends with, either through SANDS, open uni, or having a special needs child. I received some beautiful cards and letters through the post with cheques, along with a beautiful story book for hope from a fellow angel mummy. I'll keep all these forever!
At the end of the race, I was chatting with Hope's visual impairment teacher who came in just before me, and a lady approached me, and said 'i saw your pledge on your t-shirt (photo above. We had to write why we were running) and wanted to give you something towards your cause'. Well, that did it for me and Hope's teacher. Both of us were choked and teary eyed.
Mary and I had a sweaty hug as we congratulated ourselves on how far we've come. I don't think we ever imagined we'd ever actually get as far as the half marathon. We joined the half marathon training program when we were running about a mile or 2. Each week the distance grew, and we kept amazing ourselves , but we just kept saying 'we'll keep trying'. Expecting that at some point , we'd hit a wall, and not be able to do it anymore.
I know I'd never have considered it without Mary! Infact , who's crazy idea was it? What made us think 'let's do a half marathon' and not a 5k or 10k? Lol
I know I'd never have achieved it without the support from shin splints- thank you so much to all the mentors there!
But more than all that, there was one very special lil Lady that kept me going. Each difficult step I took, I took it knowing that I CAN, and I am lucky that I can. But Hope can't. So the least I can do, is to keep stepping, so that she can have the wheels she deserves!
Love you so much my honkey. Mummy will get you the best baby wheelchair there is. You will ride in style and luxury! Thank you for being you!!!
To say that Hope was a much wanted baby would be an understatement. Longed for, dreamed of and needed would be closer to the truth. Her big brother Sam died on Christmas day 07, leaving her Mummy, Daddy, big sister- Jordan, and big brother Max sad beyond words. Four months after lil Sam's death, and we were blessed with another pregnancy. Surely everything would be ok this time around? Sam had died of a diapramatic hernia, so knowing the increased odds of having another baby with CDH, we waited before breaking the news to Jordan and Max. At 13 weeks gestation, we were given the all clear and told the baby was a boy. So why was I dreaming about a little girl called Hope? We broke the news to an excited Jordan and Max. This is when the growing fetus was named 'Honk' (will explain this at some point). After 2 weeks of delight our bubble was burst. There was something wrong. Here began our rollercoaster. Baby Hope was diagnosed prenatally with cerebellum hypoplasia and ventriculomegaly. We were advised to...I can't even type it, but obviously we didn't. Fot the first 3 months Hope appeared to be 'normal' - against the odds, but as time went on, it is becoming clear that all may not be as well as it could be. Hope is now globally delayed, and has recently been diagnosed with epilepsy. Did we ask for a special child? No, but we have been blessed with one. Would we turn back time? No. Hope has bought light where there was dark; smiles where there were tears. I'm sure we will learn more from her than we will ever teach her. Who knows what the future holds for Hope. But I swear, I will always do the best by her and she will know love! Update: Hope has recently been diagnosed with a mitochondrial disorder (high lactic acidosis). Due to the fact that any findings will not provide cures or even treatments we have declined further investigations (skin and muscle biopsies seem too much ).
I am happily married to Chris. I am Mummy to 4 beautiful children, but my beautiful 3rd baby is in heaven.
I am in my 5th year of a BA degree in Childhood and youth Studies. I enjoy my children, reading, studying, blogging, facebook, my friends, and if i get a spare moment, my newest hobby is knitting pretty little things for my smallest princess.